When Women Cry, Let Them

Salam. When I wanted to begin this entry and searched for J. Kadison's When A Woman Cries in the you.tube, I found this video. It was a good one, at least I could get something from a man's point of view. And his sincerity was plain to see. 

Men and women are meant to be different. To complete one another. But in some areas where the differences are too wide apart, things begin to be in conflict. That needs patience and tolerance and support and every other positive nouns and verbs the vocabularies could offer.

The biggest don't is to stop her. Oh no, she won't stop. She CAN'T.

Asking her why won't help either. That would only make her cry even harder.

Let alone bark and force her to talk it out. That kills her inside.

Or worst, hit her (or hit something else, even). That tears her apart. Buries her alive.

She cries because she's alive. She'll stop when she's dead.

When she's dead before her time comes, she's the coldest, the meanest creature on earth.

When a woman cries, let her.

All she needs is to be held close. To know someone is there for her. 

If you can't hold her in your arms, your emotional presence is enough.

If you can't grip her with your hands, do it with your eyes.

When she feels loved and cared and safe, she'll eventually stop by herself.

And then she will talk. You don't even need to ask her to.

And she will love you with all the kindness the Earth and the Heavens have to offer.

There's a hadith (Sahih Bukhari and Muslim) we can ponder:

 Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah's Apostle said, "Treat women nicely, for a woman is created from a rib, and the most curved portion of the rib is its upper portion, so, if you should try to straighten it, it will break, but if you leave it as it is, it will remain crooked.  So treat women nicely"

And I particularly love the following words of an unknown author that have been famously printed in most of Malaysian wedding invitation cards (but of course they're printed in Malay): 

Woman was created from the rib of man

She was not made from his head to top him
Nor from his feet, to be trampled on.
She was made from his side, to be equal to him
From under his arm to be protected by him
From near his heart to be loved by him.

That's about it, folks. Now you know what to do when a woman cries. ^_^

Thanks for staying tune. See you again soon.

Much love, TPJ.